The Age of the Psychotic Blinds

I just spent the last five minutes of my life trying to get my psychotic blinds to come down. They are stubborn little devils and I have yet to succeed with them, but never fear my will is stronger than theirs and I will have my way! Believe it or not that sounded a lot better when I was actually yanking and pulling on those dumb blinds. I hate when you think of something incredibly witty and hilarious and then forget it or even worse think of after the fact. That's just depressing because you spend the rest of your life hoping that someone will give you the opportunity to display your clever whit. Friday I was asked by a rather shocked looking guy if I were engaged because I was wearing my purity ring on the all important left hand third finger. I will never forgive myself for not recognizing this golden opportunity! I still can't understand why I let it slip through my fingers! The next time someone so much as glances at my purity ring with a look of shock in their face I will be spinning them the story of a lifetime!! I thought of this doozy! Here's the senario. Elaine will be the person asking me if I'm engaged and I'll play me! (I really don't know why I'm so excited)

Elaine "Oh my goodness Allison are you engaged??!!!!"

Allison looks forlornly down at her finger baring that accursed ring, tears gather in her eyes, she takes several breathes gathering the courage to tell her tale.

"Well Elaine I was engaged, but I'm not anymore. I just *sob* couldn't bring myself to take the ring off. While I have it on there is still a little piece of him left in my life."

"Ahhhh. Allison I'm so sorry!! Do you need a hug? What happened? Do you want to talk about it?" says the silly sympathetic Elaine.

"Well, the short story is, he left me for another girl. I just kept the ring on because I just can't believe he's really gone and part of me keeps hoping that he'll come back." by now tears are flowing from Allison's large brown eyes.

"Oh Allison that's awful! How long ago was that?" the gullible Elaine queries.

"Thirteen Years." admits Allison with an evil grin, so often present on her conniving face.

Hehehehehe wouldn't that be fun?? And just for the record Caleb Bixby and I were engaged in the first grade and he did in fact leave me for another girl! But I really haven't been waiting for him to come back for thirteen years....last year I finally gave up. I really need to go to bed! Can you believe I was actually tearing up when I was writing that hokey piece of penny fiction?