Walk With Me Down Memory Lane....

Why is it that when I have the most to do I seem to lose the ability to concentrate? I have 6 rather large projects to finish by the beginning of next week, but all I can do is look at my Christmas ornaments and think how cool they are. I've also been going through all the pictures on my computer and laughing at how ridiculous everyone looked in "the good 'ol days"......enjoy...

Sooooo Addicted.....

You Were Nice This Year!

You're an uber-perfect person who is on the top of Santa's list. You probably didn't even *think* any naughty thoughts this year. Unless you're a Mormon, you've probably been a little too good. Is that extra candy cane worth being a sweetheart for 365 days straight?

Were You Naughty or Nice This Year?

Hotels....blah

I have officially decided that I hate hotels. The very thought of how many people have slept in the bed I am now occupying is enough to turn my stomach. From the gross stains on the white washcloths to the sinks that never quite look clean to bathroom doors that don't lock, I detest the so-called hotel chain comfort. Perhaps it would not be so bad if I were in a 6 star hotel, but who really has the money for those? I think I am more of an RV type (the nice ones). I like to know who has been sleeping on my bed, looking in my mirror, and using my toilet. I personally do not have great trust in maids. I know that they are paid to clean, but it is my opinion that if a maid cleans someone else's mess day after day for years and years they are bound to get a wee lazy in their cleaning. There are many things I have always wondered about hotels. First, who gets paid to decorate? As I look around my room right now, the carpets clash with the drapes, the bed covering clash with the wall border, and the wall color clashes with the pictures. So apparently the decorator thought that by clashing everything, it would all match. Secondly, why do hotels pretty much always have white towels? They stain and show dirt the easiest. And if the purpose of having white towels is to let guests know that the towels are in fact clean, then why do most of them have stains on them? Also why are the bathrooms usually completely white (well at least originally white but have become dingy with age)? You would think that in an effort to make their hotel look as new and clean for as long as possible they would choose another color that would stay fresher longer. Although I am a huge fan of choices and it makes my heart glad to see two types of fluffy pillows on my bed clearly labeled: soft and firm, I wish they had thought of the millions of people who need to sleep on flat pillows lest they have chronic neck pain the next morning. I feel like I should throw out a couple positive components about hotels: I love the ice machines and the coffee makers in the rooms. End of positive. The majority of the objections I have against hotels would not bother most people. I tend to be a wee bit persnickety when it comes to things of that nature. I like things that are dirty to be my dirt, not some stranger's (who may have diseases) dirt. With a soilder's grim determination, I grit my teeth a plunge ahead into the unknown filth, taking comfort in that fact that if I don't survive my stay at Holiday Inn, I will be going to heaven.

Awww Shucks!

Your Dominant Intelligence is Linguistic Intelligence

You are excellent with words and language. You explain yourself well. An elegant speaker, you can converse well with anyone on the fly. You are also good at remembering information and convicing someone of your point of view. A master of creative phrasing and unique words, you enjoy expanding your vocabulary. You would make a fantastic poet, journalist, writer, teacher, lawyer, politician, or translator.

What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

Hot and Easy.....That's Me

I received a letter today from my brother who is graduating from basic on Friday. Apparently a lot of his little sailor buddies have been asking him if he had a "hot sister" coming to graduation and if she was "easy". Normally, this would cause a lady great humiliation and anger, however, I have a twisted sense of humor and found it quite amusing for I am neither hot nor easy. In fact I think that I am probably the farthest from "easy" as a girl can get. I really hope that one of the sailors tries something so that I can smack him across the face, which may be a twisted desire, but I think it would be fun. I need to remember not to walk by myself. Seriously, what kind of a guy asks their buddy if his sister is "hot and easy?" John said that he told them I wasn't hot and easy which I'm kind of insulted about because he implied that I was unattractive....Anyway, suffice to say pray for me this weekend when I am surrounded by perverted womanizing sailors.

Insomnia....

Ladies and gentlemen it has struck again! For the second night in a row I cannot seem to sleep. Ah. Random thoughts keep popping into my head and I cannot make them go away. I tried to count sheep in a variety of ways. First I tried a plain black background with a white fence and grey sheep jumping over it. That didn't work so I changed the background to a bright blue sky with fluffy white clouds and green rolling hills with white sheep jumping over a white fence. After about 77 sheep I gave that scenario up as well and moved into my final attempt to count sheep, this one was worthy of the Ziegfeld Follies. Using the same scenerary as the last, I imagined my little white sheep in bright colorful sequined costumes doing flips and cartwheels over the fence. I think that I was thinking too hard about not thinking and that is my problem. That and this week is a killer. I have two projects to do, a big test and a HUGE paper to do all before Thursday afternoon. This weekend my brother graduates from boot camp and it is family weekend there soooooo no school work will be accomplished. Thank goodness for Thanksgiving break!!!

Life on the Skyride

The skyride at my lovely amusement park is hated more than the other rides. For some odd reason, people seem to lose the little amount of intelligence and common sense they had left the instant they step onto the platform. Chaotic is the best word to describe the day to day operations of the horizontal ski lift. Normal troubles include: customers stepping out of the queue gate too early, dropping shoes when getting on the chair (thus making me run after them to return it), attempting to bring water balloons, large umbrellas, giant beach bags and other potentially hazardous items (you name someone has tried to bring it), spitting on people below, bouncing in the chairs, smoking, and other general sitting difficulties. One day when my brother was working things got even more out of hand than normal: the skyride was held hostage. It was 6:30 pm and all was running relatively smoothly when a group of immature hick adults reached the front of the line. Being a sharp employee, my brother quickly noticed that their wristbands had expired a half an hour earlier, 6:00. Now it is park policy to let riders on a maximum of 10 minutes after wristbands expire, but 30 minutes is simply not going to happen. My brother then informs the lovely patrons that their wristbands have expired and if they wished to ride more rides that they needed to either purchase tickets or another wristband. This idea did not resonate very well with these big headed people. After an intense argument, they knew my brother would not budge so they played the supervisor card and cheated a little. Instead of moving towards the side so other people could get on the ride, as my brother calmly and rationally suggested, they decided it would be a good idea not to budge one single inch, essentially holding the ride hostage. Throughout this whole ordeal my brother is walking back and forth unloading the incoming riders and fighting with the stubborn rednecks in line. Finally after 20 minutes of the skyride being held hostage, the supervisor arrives to save the day. Unfortunately the office sent the nice one. Instead of calling in security and throwing their butts out of the park, nice Dwayne lets them all ride. Had it been any other supervisor, there is a strong possibility that those people would have been in jail. However that is just classic Dwayne, he's too nice. In another incident involving the skyride, while I was working it actually, Dwayne had a police report filed accusing him of assault and battery after he had confronted two girls about spitting on the skyride. He was very polite about it. After they had exited the car he called them to the center of the platform and kindly requested that they read the posted rules allowed to him. Their father was in the car behind. He was a very angry man. As soon as his feet touched the ground he was at poor Dwayne's throat yelling about how they were "his girls and it was his responsibility to punish." Kindly, the irate man was reminded that the girls were in Dwayne's park and that made it his responsibility. This made the man livid. Seething with unrestrained hatred, the dastardly villain spewed words that innocent little me cannot repeat. Finally, Dwayne gave up trying to talk to them reasonably and hid on the Ferris Wheel platform for a while. About three hours later he returned to ask if I remembered the events clearly enough to be a witness if it went to court. Unfortunately it never did. I'm rather disappointed because I think it would be very cool to be a witness....Have I mentioned how much I love my job?

Hmmmmm.....This May Be Very True....

You Failed Your Driver's Test

You only got 4/10 correct. If you have a driver's license, it needs to be revoked!

Are You a Good Driver?

If you could be any animal, what would you be and why?

Tonight I went with my unit to this cute little coffee shop/ice cream parlor for some fun and giggles. After we all got out little treats and settled down into some couches certain people among us thought it would be a grand idea to play truth or truth. All at once I knew I should have gone with my first instinct to go to bed early instead of attending this unit activity. For one thing when a group of girls play truth or truth they always ask the same questions, it is retarded. I want to shoot myself and I feel my intelligence leaking through my ears as the game progresses. This is not the only reason I detest truth or truth. My face must be formed in such a way that says "don't ask me anything about boys or kissing because I am sweet and naive and know nothing about anything like that" because I ALWAYS get asked the same question: If you could be any animal, what would you be and why? With an annoyed look on face I always answer, "I would be a cat so that I could lay in the sun all day long and randomly bite at people whenever I feel like it." That my friends is the only question I will be asked all night long. This may sound very 7th grade of me to say, but I wish for once, when I am forced to participate in these stupid annoying girly games that someone would ask me something interesting. I swear if I get asked the animal question one more time I am going to blow a gasket.

We soon tired of truth or truth so we moved on to most awkward/embarrassing moments. While the other girls stories consisted of bad kissing experiences or farting on dates, mine were about my lovely amusement park experiences. Now if this doesn't show people I have no life I really don't know what else will. I have no bad dates to recall or kisses that I have messed up, simply because I have never been on a date or kissed a guy. Not that I'm complaining or anything. I'm simply stated facts. ;) One of my most awkward amusement park experiences occurred on a ride that required me to check safety belts around the crotch area. After performing this task hours upon hours in one day, an operator can do this very quickly. I went a little too quick one time and missed the strap and basically smacked a guy in the crotch. He was perverted too so that didn't help matters at all. So after apologies on my part and many snide remarks about me doing it on purpose I was able to run away and hide in my little booth for a while. Another time I was working on one of the coasters and asked a group of four college guys for their tickets. They decided the best way to get me to let them ride for free was to lie to me, after that didn't work they moved to hitting on me. Of course me being me I was in the process of calling a supervisor when they reluctantly coughed up their tickets. While collecting tickets I was lecturing them on the evils of lying and the purpose of rules when one of them spied my super cool Barbie bandaid on my knee and decided to show his admiration for it by stroking my knee. If I weren't so nice I would have given him a bloody nose. Oh how I love my job!

Moonlight Serenade...

Tonight I was serenaded by a man for the very first time. My friend Brian wrote this for me for my birthday. It made me giggle.

HAPPY B-DAY ALLISON

Allison you are so fine
Too bad I only see you in McConn's line
But that's ok, yeah that's alright
We both have homework late into the night

And I am glad that we've both taken time
To chill out and get out of the grind
Yeah this feels ok, It feels alright
But soon we'll have homework late into the night

I'm thinking what kind of girl likes Star Trek?
William Shatner's thinkin' what the heck?
This girl must be cool, she must be quite fine
I wish I could see her outside of McConn's line

And I'm glad that we've both taken some time
To just get out of the grind
Yeah this feels ok, it feels alright
Now we must go and do homework into the night....man!

My Friends Are the Best!!!

As If I Needed Another Reason....

Today I had the rather unique opportunity to fed a little girl her dinner. Before all the "awwww that is soooo cute"'s start pouring in, let me clarify. When I said little I meant a 90 pound 18 year old girl. My dear friend is a nursing student and for extra credit in one of her classes she had to have one of her friends feed her dinner. I, being a wonderful, fantastic, amazing friend, was elected. Although I tried to keep my mind off the more disturbing elements of the feeding process by singing the Baby Bubble Bee song and various Christmas carols, the urge to regurgitate would not leave. I don't quite understand what made it so disgusting. I have cleaned up more than my fair share of people's barf that I don't even know and that doesn't phase me at all. Becca I know very well and the very thought of feeding her turns my stomach. Perhaps it was the tickling sensation that moved through my had as her teeth scraped the fork or the way I could feel each slurp of liquid through the cup as she drank. Blah. Becca I love you but I am never feeding you every again. Anyway, all that to say I have found yet another reason that I could never ever become a nurse. I really didn't need another reason, I have so many already: blood, oozing bodily fluids, bedpans, bed baths, smelly people, long hours, bad breath...you get the picture. To all nurses everywhere I offer to you a round of applause and a simple thank you for all the icky stuff you have to do.